Jb Knows

A Teen Writer’s Trip to the Top

The _____ Day Ever (Part 1) February 20, 2009

Why today may be the worst day so far in my (young) life:

1. Someone that I like is getting married.  It does not matter who.  I do not want to marry him.  But the fact that he is currently engaged is depressing.

2. My boyfriend was not in school today.  I carefully made the point of wearing the necklace he gave me today, and he was not there to see me effort.  The reason that he was not here is because he is sick.  I coughed a couple times today and fear I have caught his cold.  And he told me he was not contagious!

3. The Forensics 3 Curse.  Every year, the day of the 3rd forensics meeting, I manage to injure at least two of my fingers.  I forgot about the curse until I received a paper cut.  Later, before the meeting, I smashed another one of my fingers in my organizer.

4. One of my friends may be gay.  This in itself is not an issue.  The issue is that this is someone I have/do have a crush on and who, I believed, had a crush/was hitting on me.  Could that be any more embarrassing?

5. I have not finished a poem in days.  Also I found out a friend of mine is a VERY good writer.  You know, good for him.  But it only makes me look even worse.

6. My English sucks (excuse my French).  I have a pen pal in Korea who is hoping (or is it hopping?) that I will help her out with her English.  As if I am an expert in the language I claim to speak!

7. Lunch was a series of badness.  First I clearly called a seat check, which was ignored.  When I came back, the only seat left was one that was covered in glitter.  I took it. Then I proceded to spill msahed potatoes all over myself.  Not to mention, before I had I chance to bite into my sandwhich, Scotty looked over (we usually order the same thing) and says “Just so you know, the food tastes like ass today.”

 

Green Intellect December 27, 2008

I am (attempting to) start a charitable organization.  Hopefully, I can convince my friend Amelia (see ‘Losing My Religion’) to join me.  She would be the perfect partner and combination.

To start of the organization will be called Green Intellect.  The goal is to preserve the earth and knowledge for future generations.  It will promote literacy and education through book and school supply drives and will give appreciation to educators.  It will give environment awareness and improvement in Earth Day related celebrations and activities.

And Amelia would be perfect to help me start it up.  If not for the support, at least for a good tag line.  Imagine this: “An organization focused on education and the environment.  Created by a science loving, tree hugging, underachieving agnostic (me) and her counseling, straight-A, Catholic friend (Amelia).”

 

I Was Just Thinking… About That Speech You Gave December 25, 2008

Can I just scream?  That would get it out.  Get IT out.  All out, all gone, it’s lost.  I’m lost.  Truly don’t know what to say.  Don’t get weird on you?  What is that supposed to mean?  On you?  Don’t be weird.  I was already weird, but you certainly are not helping.  This is driving me crazy.  You are driving me crazy!  Do you want me to be crazy?  It sure seems like your goal.  Get me alone, crazy, stupid.  (Alone.  We are alone.  Two stupid lonely souls combining to get… You are not alone.  You already have…) No, not stupid, terrible thing to say.  That someone so smart could be so stupid.  (Might have to take me out back and…)

Me?  Smart?  Smart aleck, smartastic, sarcastic?  Yes.  Smart?  No.
My blood is running cold and I am shaking.  Not from the cold, I’m used to the weather.  But this -this thing- makes me shiver, my hairs stand on end.  On end, the end.  Is this my end?  End is definite, death too final, too simple.  (Suicide is no longer an option.) The dead are cold.  Am I dead?  I think, therefore I am, therefore living.  Can I be and still be dead?  It’s not a physical cold, (physical.  Physical cold.  Physical hot.) it’s a psychological cold.  All in my head.  All in.  All or nothing, in my head.  Making it up, of course not intentionally.  Or, yes, intentionally, subconsciously.
Talking about it does not calm anybody down.  It is not up for discussion. (SHUT UP) It is to reflect and drive me crazy, but it is never to be discussed.  With anyone, especially you.  I cannot talk to you about you.  (You: the object of my affection, my attention.  My excuse for lack of attention to things others deem important.)
Take a pain killer, numb myself.  Hardly solves anything.  Seems that whenever I am numb is exactly when I need to feel.  (Feel what?  Feel who?  Feel life.)

 

Who I am December 9, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — samke23 @ 11:07 pm
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SEX, for all purposes, is a drug.  It alters your thought process and makes you do stupid things (and stupid people).  It allows you to ‘rise to the occasion’ and commit false acts of bravery.  With sex, just like with drugs, you can catch a disease by sharing your needle with the wrong person.  And let’s not forget the convenient forgetting of things, whether it be your name or theirs, associated with either action.

MANIPULATION, is the most sincere form of flattery.  The ends justify the means, with the ends usually being a warm bed or a higher grade (be careful of mixing the two).  Patience is a virtue, but I’m not exactly applying for sainthood.  Waiting is pointless, because I know what I want, and I want it now.

BOUNDARIES, were meant to be crossed.  Cross mine and suffer my wrath.  Cross yours and we could be great friends.  But that doesn’t mean I won’t lie straight to your face or never betray you, because my boundaries do not include a jail cell.  That is, unless you are in the system.  Then you cannot find anyone more loyal than myself.